When Best Friends Become Strangers -

Do you have that one person you used to be so close with, but so suddenly became nothing more than just, well, a stranger?

I do.

I have friends whom at one point I can't picture not being close to. I love them -- we bonded and connected so well. Then one day I woke up only to realise, they were no longer a huge part of my life.

I don't know what exactly happened. And how, in a short span of time, we drifted apart.

I don't know if I should feel bad. Or to feel like it is my fault.

Maybe I didn't reach out enough?  

Or maybe I've done something wrong? 

There's no clear cut answer to these questions. Maybe simply because our paths have changed along the way. Maybe because we didn't connect like we used to.

But I think it is okay. I'd like to believe so.
There is nothing wrong with having amazing people in life one day and simply going separate ways shortly after. Friends respect each other -- may it be decisions made, or even the journeys taken.

Friends don't judge each other just because the decisions are different.

Sometimes I hear people talk about how those who drifted as one who doesn't "value" the friendship. But is it really about "value"? Is it about making this friendship works simply because it was there at one point? Or is it possible that, just like lovers, we were in each others lives for a particular reason and once that reason is fulfilled, we move on?


People change. No big deal.
Change is what human do as part of being, well, human. It's a basic component of our basic and collective survival. But we fear this change. Maybe because it reminds us of our mortality.

We are always changing even when we hate to admit it.
We are all, maybe, the centre of our own universes. Sometimes this might overlaps with other people's and that small bit of intersection leave some parts of it changed.

The collision can: wreck us, change us, shift us. Sometimes we merge into one. Most other times, we resist.

What I'm saying is: if you're in that situation I once was, y'know, feeling guilty for drifting apart from very close friends -- don't. It happens, and it's normal.

I have made different decisions. I have taken different paths. Some of these decisions and paths taken are different than what my close friends would've decided upon. So it's harder for them to swallow.

Some might think otherwise but to me, this doesn't mean we can't remain friends. Simply because we change. Simply because we decided on different paths. It simply means -- it happens and it's okay!

I learned that holding on to that regret didn't do me any good.

I was blaming myself for something I had to respect -- their decision to leave because the path I've chosen is simply, well, different. Maybe they didn't fully understand why I did what I did -- but that's okay.

So, I move on.


We all start as strangers. The hope is to grow with our friends. But more often, we grow apart. And become strangers again.

So accept and respect how things have become. Remember -- you can't control everything and the past is the past. There's only so much you can do.

Given a chance -- I'm sure we all want these people to be back in our lives but at one point, we simply have no idea how to make it happen. Either we are too scared to be the one who reach out first or we just don't know what to say.


But maybe one day our paths might cross. And if that happens, do we try again?