MOVED -

So, after much contemplation - I finally gave in and paid for a domain.
I'm not blogging at
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These Traveling Feet -

Feel free to come and visit ;)

Relocating Overseas? Five Things That Might Help -

Cross-posted from my blog, The Runaway Expat.

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Moving abroad for the first time can (occasionally) be a very baffling decision.
But if you're considering it, I'd say "Go for it!" --

It will not only be life changing; but a rewarding experience too. Trust me.


Research -

So you've accepted this amazing job offer in a far-flung land. Go online -- get to know where you're going, talk to people who have been there. You know, do something about it. If possible, ask your new company to allow a pre-visit so you'll know what to expect when you arrive.

Meet People - 

When you first arrive in your new host country, it is important to meet people and make new friends. Get involve at school (if you're a parent), seek out local groups and don't just stick to the expats (though I quite like InterNations community). Not isolating yourself from others can greatly improve your perspective of your new home and it helps to have local (and expats alike) friends to connect with.

Learn the Language - 

This doesn't mean you have to be fluent in the span of one month. But, yes, learn the language of your new home. It'll make life much easier especially if you're going to live in a country where English isn't widely spoken. Know the basic at the very least. It will help you get around, and boost relationships at your new workplace.

Be Open; Embrace Independence - 

If you've always been dependent on someone (it could be your parents, spouse, etc.), you might have a hard time abroad. It is important to learn how to do things yourself. You also need to be comfortable being alone, be open to surprises and not always compare your host country to your home. Sure, the grass might be greener at home but if you keep thinking about it, it'll make your transition a very hard one.

"No Vacancies" - 

Don't underestimate how many guests you will have in your first year abroad. Sometimes, these requests might even come from people you haven't heard from in years. I'm not saying say no to everyone; but don't let yourself get overbooked. You need time to get to know your new city, your new life. Constantly having guests to entertain is certainly not conducive.


And honestly. It will not be a bed of roses -- there will be times when your new expat life displeases you, when you desperately want to go home to your comfort zone. But then, there will be days when you realise how lucky you are to have the opportunities many can only dream of having.


So, live it up.
Bon Voyage! Gueti Reis! 잘다녀오십시오!


All the very best of luck with your new adventure.

When Best Friends Become Strangers -

Do you have that one person you used to be so close with, but so suddenly became nothing more than just, well, a stranger?

I do.

I have friends whom at one point I can't picture not being close to. I love them -- we bonded and connected so well. Then one day I woke up only to realise, they were no longer a huge part of my life.

I don't know what exactly happened. And how, in a short span of time, we drifted apart.

I don't know if I should feel bad. Or to feel like it is my fault.

Maybe I didn't reach out enough?  

Or maybe I've done something wrong? 

There's no clear cut answer to these questions. Maybe simply because our paths have changed along the way. Maybe because we didn't connect like we used to.

But I think it is okay. I'd like to believe so.
There is nothing wrong with having amazing people in life one day and simply going separate ways shortly after. Friends respect each other -- may it be decisions made, or even the journeys taken.

Friends don't judge each other just because the decisions are different.

Sometimes I hear people talk about how those who drifted as one who doesn't "value" the friendship. But is it really about "value"? Is it about making this friendship works simply because it was there at one point? Or is it possible that, just like lovers, we were in each others lives for a particular reason and once that reason is fulfilled, we move on?


People change. No big deal.
Change is what human do as part of being, well, human. It's a basic component of our basic and collective survival. But we fear this change. Maybe because it reminds us of our mortality.

We are always changing even when we hate to admit it.
We are all, maybe, the centre of our own universes. Sometimes this might overlaps with other people's and that small bit of intersection leave some parts of it changed.

The collision can: wreck us, change us, shift us. Sometimes we merge into one. Most other times, we resist.

What I'm saying is: if you're in that situation I once was, y'know, feeling guilty for drifting apart from very close friends -- don't. It happens, and it's normal.

I have made different decisions. I have taken different paths. Some of these decisions and paths taken are different than what my close friends would've decided upon. So it's harder for them to swallow.

Some might think otherwise but to me, this doesn't mean we can't remain friends. Simply because we change. Simply because we decided on different paths. It simply means -- it happens and it's okay!

I learned that holding on to that regret didn't do me any good.

I was blaming myself for something I had to respect -- their decision to leave because the path I've chosen is simply, well, different. Maybe they didn't fully understand why I did what I did -- but that's okay.

So, I move on.


We all start as strangers. The hope is to grow with our friends. But more often, we grow apart. And become strangers again.

So accept and respect how things have become. Remember -- you can't control everything and the past is the past. There's only so much you can do.

Given a chance -- I'm sure we all want these people to be back in our lives but at one point, we simply have no idea how to make it happen. Either we are too scared to be the one who reach out first or we just don't know what to say.


But maybe one day our paths might cross. And if that happens, do we try again?

Hello, January!

Nothing is predestined.
The obstacles of your past can become the gateways that lead to new beginnings.

- Ralph Blum